It’s 7:30 pm CST, the night before my birthday. Per usual, I am at home, doing nothing special. Last year, I had an almost 6 month old on my Dirtieth, and now, Khai is almost 18 months. I don’t feel bad for not celebrating my birthday, simply because I never do. It’s just something that I am not that into. People go all out for their 30th, getting drunk and turning up, not even remembering what happened unless they look at photos and videos of the night, the next morning.
I don’t drink, I don’t do clubs, I don’t party: I’m an introvert, to say the least. I am also on a debt free journey and all of the things I just listed, cost money, lots of money depending on how big a person goes. So how does a 31-year-old millennial single mother bring in her birthday? I’ll tell you how: sitting on her bedroom floor in her Burlington pj’s, writing a blog post in the dark as to not wake her sleeping baby, that’s how. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
A fine way to bring in my birthday by writing a blog post almost 2 months after the last one. I feel as though each time I come back to my blog, I always promise consistency. Well, no more. Now, I promise just to post more often and not so far and few in between. Blogging is my first love and as a 31-year-old millennial single mother, I still want this blog to become something bigger than what I could have ever imagined.
I’ve been blogging almost 9 years, well, 10 actually. I don’t think I have ever taken it serious. I always thought I’d be this big time blogger by now. However, despite the lack in posting, I have been gaining followers like crazy. I am not sure how or why, but I am grateful for all my new followers, welcome.
I’ve been intending to get a blogpost, or three, out before my birthday and we see how that turned out. Everyday I tell myself that I am going to sit down and write when Khai goes to bed, and every night I put him to bed, I go to sleep right along with him. It’s no excuse, and I feel like I have been making a lot of excuses lately especially when it comes to things that can be making me money and helping me to get out of debt a little faster. I make excuses to get out of working Shipt, finishing resources and uploading them to TpT, advertising the products on my site, everything. The real reason? I don’t even know.
Have I lost motivation because I thought by this time in my life I would be successfully working for myself? Am I secretly blaming that I am always tired because of work and being a mom (which is definitely not an excuse because I see single mothers with more than one child killing this entrepreneur shit left and right)? What is it?
If I want to achieve something, it won’t be handed to me. I have to work for it and stop making excuses and feeling sorry for myself. One thing I know is that I throw a lot of pity parties for myself and I am the only one who shows up each and every time: no one else. Why? Because no one but me, pity’s me. That has to stop now, before the clock strikes midnight and I’m on my 31st rotation around the sun. I have to show up for my son, and most importantly, my damn self.
I have no long list of 31 things that life has taught me, because, well, life has taught me over a million things. What I do know is that time stands still for no one. Doesn’t matter if you need more time, time isn’t always promised. I have to live in the now and deal with right now, because who knows what tomorrow brings.
So here’s to seeing the sun rise and the sunset for 31 years. Happy Birthday to this bestselling, blogger award winning, debt free living, crushing single motherhood, healthy, fit, and positivity set mind, Queen!