My Life, Vegan Mommy Things

Death Becomes Me

I was never afraid to die until I had Malakhai. Now all I can’t hink about is what will happen if I’m not here? How will he survive? Granted I know the answers but I don’t want Malakhai to have to live in a world as a child without his mother. I never want to leave him but death is inevitable.

Of course, I have life insurance for the both of us so he’s taken care of, but even thinking about life insurance and last wills is disheartening, to think that Malakhai will have to eventually live without me.

I know we are all born to eventually die, but I always wonder why do we have to die? Why is there death? What’s the purpose of life if you’re only going to die? If I die, will I get to see my ancestors again? Will I be Malakhai’s guardian angel? So many questions that need answers, but no one to give them.

So I just sit and think about life right now and if I die today, will I leave this earth giving Malakhai the tools to succeed and will I leave a legacy and the answer to both is a terse “no”. So now, it’s high time I make a conscious effort to change all of that.

I will leave this earth with a legacy left behind in the hands of my son. He will know how to survive without clocking in somewhere.

How do you feel about death?

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